The 51st State

I've just had the most amazing revelation.

I was working on a chapter for my ongoing semi-autobiographical book about the rock scene in the 1980s, and was covering the bizarre story of ex-KISS man Vinnie Vincent's wife's disappearance in January 1998.

That's another story for another day, though, along with Motley Crue bassist Nikki Sixx's doppelganger, who claimed that he replaced him in the band for three years following a near fatal car crash. Seriously, you couldn't make this stuff up.

Anyway, my revelation came about when I was running the spell checker and aside from the usual transposed letters and my constant inability to spell focused correctly, my laptop suddenly informed me that I had spelt Conneticut incorrectly.

Now, the eagle-eyed among you will have noticed immediately that I have just deliberately misspelled it (and if you actually live in the state and didn't notice, shame on you), but I was literally stopped dead in my literary tracks because for my whole life I have been convinced that Connecticut was actually spelled Conneticut.

I sat looking at this strange new, yet clearly correct (I even checked with the state's official website), spelling and felt not unlike a small child having finally realised that the only fat guy in a suit that comes into your room on Christmas Eve is, well, let's not spoil that for any believers who may be reading.

I just couldn't comprehend that America's fourth most densely populated state looked as though it should be pronounced connect-i-cut, which for some unknown reason had my brain conjuring up images of the old Connect 4 game.

It started me wondering how many other things I have wilfully misinterpreted over the years, and reminded me of a story I read once about a holy man who had prayed in front of the same stained glass window for his whole life and when asked was certain that there were three panels, when in fact there were four. I wish I could find this story again, but sadly Google is not my friend on this occasion.

On the bright side, however, I now know how to spell Connecticut correctly, and thanks to my visiting the state website know more about it now than I ever did, including the fact that one George Walker Bush was born there.

Oh well, ever silver lining has a cloud, eh?